Pickup Lines That (Probably) Won’t Work #12
After the topicality of the last, holiday themed installment (which was intentionally released on Valentine’s Day), it’s back to the kitchen sink of lines, of sorts. Pickup artists probably have better things to do than use these lines, but then again they have better things to do than be pickup artists… usually. As usual, lines are contributed by Matt “GrandDracolich“, who recently got back from playing Planetside II, according to his Steam profile. If you find out what the URL of it is, it’ll probably be from him.
111. I have about twelve hours before I have to go back to the hospital, so how about we make the most of it?
113. Hey there everyone, this is Raocow!
This person has been removed due to a copyright claim from Viacom Ltd.
114. Girl, your fingers look like tentacles!
115. I had a dream about you last night. You’re even cuter in person.
116. Are you made of asbestos? ‘Cause you’re making me all itchy and short of breath.
“Dude, you’re on fire!” “I know, that’s like the fourth chick I’ve scored with tonight!”
117. Hey baby, I have six eyes, so I can still have depth perception when I wink at you.
118. Can I pick you up?
119. Are you the sun? ‘Cause looking straight at you is pretty painful.
Are you a dead fish? ‘Cause sniffing you is pretty painful.
120. Do you like spiders? I really like spiders. Wanna come see my spiders?
There is some interesting “negging” going on here, although for insulting a lady, Shakespeare reached far greater heights in “My mistress’ eyes…” …even though he had to save himself by cramming in some compliments at the end. It’ll be interesting if our author finishes the much rumored Shakespearean edition.