Home > Pickup Lines That (Probably) Won't Work > Pickup Lines That (Probably) Won’t Work #11 – Holiday Edition

Pickup Lines That (Probably) Won’t Work #11 – Holiday Edition

You know, it’s probably worth mentioning that most of these pickup lines are produced slowly and gradually, at a rate that so far has exceeded 10 a month. On the other hand, our author Matt “GrandDracolich” (ghastly as his name is) decided impulsively to make this installment a few days ago, and it produced results rather quickly. What’s the occasion, you might ask? Please note the day which this was posted. You could also check out the previous installments – the last one had no specific theme.

101. Hey baby, wanna go out with me the day after Valentine’s Day, when everything’s a lot cheaper?
102. Wanna be my ho ho ho?
Sorry, but I’ve already got myself a twinkie kid.
103. Looks like a happy new rear!
104. It’s President’s Day! Know how many presidents had mistresses?
105. Are you one of Santa’s elves? ‘Cause you’re short and your ears look weird.
106. I have a dream, and you’re in it.
Hey, I’ve had that same dream too! I always end up devouring you alive, for some reason.
107. Wanna give me something to be thankful for, today?
108. If I pinch you, it’s because you’re not wearing green.
If I punch you, it’s because I saw a Volkswagen Beatle.
109. Hey baby, you know what I love? Not being alone on Valentine’s Day.
110. I came up with a new holiday. You go out with me, and I celebrate that date every year.

Sure, today is Valentine’s day… but what about tomorrow? What about the day after that? We only have enough love to last us until April unless we start rationing it out right now! And don’t get me started on candy hearts.

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  1. 2013/02/14 at 17:47

    Do guys really need help with lines that don’t work???

    • 2013/02/15 at 01:42

      Well, you know what they say – if you’re going to strike out, you’d better strike out so badly that people will wonder how you managed such a feat.

      • 2013/02/15 at 08:25

        Or start shooting steroids and turn into the Hulk so no one wonders why you never get dates…

  1. 2013/03/19 at 16:58

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