Home > Bad Ideas, Humor, Writing > Snappy answers to stupid WordPress prompts

Snappy answers to stupid WordPress prompts

The worst thing you can do to a blog is to make it about nothing. It means that you don’t have the inspiration to write about something that actually matters to you. You might guess from this that I disapprove of the “slice-of-life” type blogs of mothers raising children, corporate employees discussing their work, and so forth, but even those are acceptable when done right. Suffice it to say that you probably shouldn’t start a blog unless there’s an idea you want to express (this sentiment is sappy and obvious, but still worth remembering).

Some time ago, WordPress added a feature that gives you numerous small prompts any time you finish a post. Some of them could be interesting, but if you ask me, it promotes the ‘meaningless blog’ mindset. Needless to say, let’s treat them with the respect and tact that they truly deserve.

1. You just acquired a magic wand. What will you use it for?

I’d bludgeon people with it, just to see the looks on their faces.

2. If you could get away with committing one crime, what would you do?

Something that would horrify masses of people, but without having any real effect on them.

3. Can you get work done while music is playing?

Can you make music while working? Can you make music for a living?

4. Name something you’d like a lifetime supply of.

I prefer not to say anything that might damage my reputation.

Oh wait.
5. Remember that one time on the bus, when…? Share your mass transit stories.

Well one day, I was on this bus thingeroo. Suddenly, this person I’d never seen before got on. They were wearing this shirt with an interesting design on it, and they sat next to me. I said “Nice shirt,” and then we engaged in small talk. Then I arrived at my destination. I never saw the person again.

6. Is the book always better than the movie? Are there any exceptions?

Is adding extra nuance to your questions worth the extra complexity and difficulty of answering them?

7. List five things you love about your culture.

“True”

8. If you could go back in time and relive one day of your life, which would you choose?

If I believe time is a loop, can I relieve tomorrow today?

9. Of all celebrity voiceovers in animated movies, which one do you think was the best fit?

What would you say if I told you I’d never seen an animated movie?

10. Create a new law that will make the world a more fun place.

Anyone who is pied in the face must consume a portion of the remnants off of their body.
11. What’s your favorite month? Why?

Why don’t you take a guess? You have a 1 in 12 chance of being right, you know?
12. If you were given a chance to know what happens in your future, would you take it?

Hey! I’m the same guy who believes that time is a loop! I’d probably use it to see into the past, just to spite you.

 

Makes you wonder if making the questions deeper would be a good idea or not.

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